My Burlesque Journey

I never thought I'd be writing this, but I have officially stood up on a stage in front of an audience and danced a burlesque routine all on my own to a room full of people with all of their eyes on me... more than once now.

How!? I genuinely don't know so if anyone can explain please do!

Back when I lived in Liverpool I went to something called Dr Sketchy's, a burlesque life drawing class where performers do a routine in front of an audience of artists then pose to be drawn in their costumes, it was great. The costumes were so beautiful and that vintage style was a joy to draw. It got me into doing illustrations for performers as a bit of income for myself and began my own interest in vintage style fashion. I admired their grace and confidence, how wonderful they looked, like showgirls of another era, I'd love to look like that!

When I moved to Derbyshire in 2011 I had contact with a few performers through my art stuff, and I ended up having a beginners burlesque class brought to my attention which I thought would be a great way to try a new form of dance and also meet some new people in this new area I'm living! So I went to classes over in Derby. In the years after I joined another class, more local to me, who were more of a troupe, in that they actually put on shows! When I first started burlesque classes I had no intention of performing in public, but then not too long after joining this troupe, I was performing two routines in their next show!  I was absolutely terrified before going on but overall I loved the experience.  Our teacher told me she felt I was one of the strongest in the group, and being the newbie, that gave me a lovely confidence boost.  I performed in a few troupe shows with these ladies, and even braved a duet in a later one. A few years after, she even asked me to teach a new course of classes at a venue she was working at.  This was a chair dance routine as opposed to traditional burlesque but still cool to try something new in the form of teacher. In 2016 I performed the first routine I had input it, and to a non-burlesque audience. Myself and a photographer friend co-choreographed a routine and fan dance to Girls on Film and Photography by Weezer to surprise our friends and co-attendees at Snap Photography Festival with. It was by far the most nervous I'd felt before a show, and in a way it ruined my experience of being able to relax and enjoy the festival in the days in the run up to the last night when we were going to be doing this surprise performance. But once I was up there the nerves did start to subside and as soon as it finished I wanted to go back out there again!

So that was 2016.  Doing a duet, to a non-burlesque crowd, and of our own creation, felt like a big step, but I still felt like doing anything on my own and actually putting myself out there as a solo performer at a proper burlesque show was a million miles off!

So then came 2021.  Towards the end of 2020 I'd been trying to clear out some stuff and came across my feather fans, originally bought from another performer years before. I'd used them once in a show, at the Snap photography duet one. I listed the fans in a facebook groups and had some interest. To have a little memory of them I decided to get glammed up and do a little self portrait shoot with them before sending them off to a new home. That was the plan! But, after doing the photos, I really started to feel like I don't actually want to sell them, they were great for photos, and maybe I *would* perform with them again one day.

A couple of months later I set up some social media pages for my burlesque persona, it was official, I was going to try push myself to brave doing something solo. I figured I could at least try! By April 2021 I had choreographed and performed by first solo routine to a live audience! Albeit during covid so via zoom, but it was a great opportunity to take that step towards doing it on a real stage. Another live show and couple of pre-recorded ones later, I had my official in person live stage debut in July 2021, doing my first routine plus my second, which I used my feather fans for.  Before 2021 this sometimes insecure introvert performed at two more in person live shows doing two performances at a time, as well as more online ones. Before the year was out I had three finished routines that I had choreographed and worked on costuming for that I had performed live to audiences.  I really can't get my head around how.  All I do know is that I'm bloomin' proud of myself. I'm very much still learning and developing in confidence and skill, but so thankful for the opportunities I've had thus far that have enabled me to push myself to do something SO far out of my comfort zone (I don't even have the words to express just how far out it is for me). 

Oh, and remember back at the start when I referred to going to a burlesque life drawing class where I got to draw fabulous performers in their costumes at the start of all this?  Guess what the format was of my last gig of 2021? 💚

For anyone out there (especially if you're a fellow introvert) that wants to push themselves to do something out of their comfort zone, even if it scares them, believe in yourself as after conquering this little goal I never thought I'd manage I know you can do it!