A less than perfect day.
We all have less than perfect days sometimes. I'm having a bit of a low one today.
We were meant to be getting up early and going to a skatepark on route to a yummy food place we'd booked for lunch, then going on to a different skatepark after. Instead, I was up at about 7am being sick. It really is one of the worst feelings. I thankfully haven't been sick again since and managed to get a few more hours sleep afterwards but it meant missing the food booking, I've re-arranged it for tomorrow. Had stomach pains most of the day and haven't had much of an appetite but have managed to eat some stuff.
I hate when you're looking forward to something and it gets taken away from you due to things out of your control 😔I hate when you feel like a day has gone to waste too, life goes quick enough without rubbish days that come and go like this. I mean, I suppose I did do some business stuff, and packaged up a load of eBay parcels of things that ended yesterday that I sold so that's some productivity.
Some other factors have got me a bit low today. I still wanted to get out after lunch try make something of the day if I didn't feel like I was going to be sick again, which I didn't, but that didn't happen either so I feel like the day's just been wasted. I got out for a walk this evening for about an hour which helped a little, get some air n' that.
Another thing on my mind today is supporting friends and family when they're having low days or patches, how you do that but also don't let it bring you down too. I've had close family battle with depression, and close friends too. Then there's other friends who like most of us just simply have down days sometimes. I like to think I'm a good listener and caring person and try my best to help people feel better, but it's hard when you feel like you're not getting anywhere and they're fixated on negativity in that moment, or saying things they don't mean out of this headspace they're in, and that energy starts bringing you down too.
It's hard.
I'm hoping tomorrow goes better and is a brighter day.
Becky x
P.S Even bad days have good parts though, one of my past brides from a couple of years back, Becki, sent me this lovely message randomly this morning ❤️
"Hello lovely, I just wanted to say - I am just looking through our wedding photos looking for a photo of my bro in law for a bday shoutout, and wanted to tell you that every time I look through the photos I am transported magically back to the day. You captured all the little moments we had and each photo comes with a story. Thank you so so much for being part of our day, I will always be grateful I found you and your wonderful beautiful work "
(I'm a wedding photographer incase you guys didn't know. Though I haven't got any wedding left this year as they've all been moved to 2021 due to the virus.)
I have been working a lot on my energy lately which sounds like a lot of woo oh, but I agree with what you're talking about, you want to help people who are feeling low but you don't want that energy to be contagious. When you live with somebody it can be extra hard because you don't always have a way to Shield yourself. I try to meditate and I tried to recognize when I have a charge for anxious emotion in myself and I try to recognize what triggers that from other people. The more you can be an outside Observer to your emotion the more control you have over it. So many emotions come from a narrative that we are playing over and over in our heads that is just based not so much on events but on our interpretation of events. You have to ground yourself in the idea that inherently the world is good, people are good and things ultimately will work out for the best. Everything is temporary and if somebody has low-grade depression because of events the event will pass if they have more strong clinical depression the best thing you can do is urge them to get help, but always protect your own energy as much as you can it's just like they tell you on an airplane can't help somebody else until you put your oxygen mask on first and the more you protect your own energy and keep yourself positive the more you can radiate that positivity to other people. The good thing is the fact that you contemplated and that you're aware of it and you're thinking about it and you care to keep your positivity even when you yourself are feeling crappy means that you already started winning the battle. I'm sorry that you felt sick and that it ate up some of your day but I'm proud of you for having good priorities and doing the best that you can be light in other people's lives as well as your own.
ReplyDeleteReally hope you are feeling a bit better and more able tommorow ❤️�� can 100% relate about being there for someone in their lowest moments, but find it's hard to not let it effect your own mental health too! Xx
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